Friday, September 18, 2009

I'm abit tipsy+vertigo+stomach cramp+abit mad

Zai Kuning's Gone but Here with You
Fresh and Raw from the hospital



For seven long years, a man has not gone a day without whisky. Sometimes a dose, but more often than not a bottle. On 8th August 2009, he finally collapsed, and thus began his topsy-turvy, dizzy-fuzzy and painfully funny self discoverring adventure in the hospital.

Gone but Here with You is an intensely personal account of a man in struggle of finding sobriety in a dozy, fatigued, boorish and thankfully, morphine-equipped medical ward.


Some people are more drunk when they get a new handphone
Some people are more drunk than the drunken when they sell their art work
Some people are more drunk when they get a simple praise
Some people are more drunk when they are arrested
Some people are more drunk if they think they belong to some kind of thing hat shit
Some people are even more drunk when they get bad news of others
Some people get even more drunk when someone dies

I am afraid of people who are in love.
I am afraid of people whose heart are broke like fuck.
I am afraid of people who are blind searching without a stick.
I am afraid of people who are horny and dig something/anything.
I am afraid of people who want to be somebody.
I am afraid of people who are attention-seekers.
I am afraid of people who take shyness as a fashion.
I am afraid of people who are happy.
I am afraid of people who come to me and try to prove to me that they are better than me. Fucking assholes!
I am afraid of people who go around spreading news about humanity when they know only half of it
I am afraid of people who use their assets to suck up everything into them.
I am afraid of people who wear all black but their underwear white.
I am afraid of people who talk about doing good just so that others will see him as good.
I am afraid of people who try to convince me the way to be what I could be is their way to be.
I am afraid of people who suck up to something with no desire to be anything else but a sucker.
I am afraid of people who found religion and want to share that with me.
I am afraid of people who only want to be my friend because they think they can make use of me.

I am afraid of people who are so good at pretending nice.
I am afraid of women who want nothing but suck my dick.
I am afraid of women who think they are so fucking cool.
I am afraid of men who want to show how manly they are.
I am afraid of people who want to take care of children with little interest in education.

I am afraid of people who only know about money.
I am afraid and yes I have fear.
I have fear, I have fear not towards these people.
I have fear for my children, friend and family whom I could not protect.

I fear for them because I am a child.
Tell me who you afraid of?






"The Singaporean as a brave, outre, critical voice - what a rarity!" - X'ho


Zai Kuning, Gone but here with you
Paperback, photocopy, 104 pages
September 2009
$6 (including postage within Singapore)

Learning from previous mistakes, onistudio will be consolidating orders till the end of September and mail them all out at one go. Please write your orders to houseofoni@yahoo.com.sg, stating your address as well.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Some came with their heads in a bottle and left with their hearts under their soles



More photographs of the opening can be found here
And a videolog of the works

The exhibition will close on 31 May, please catch it if you haven't.

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Invitation

post by shiyun

It is 11 p.m now.

I am sitting here revisiting memories of certain places, people and events that have happened to me. I have heard a monk said that if our mind were not so murky, we could visit the memories accumulated even before this life was born. This is all very good, but I think if this memory cannot make us admit our many mistakes and be thankful to those who are good to us, then it is completely useless even if we can remember all our past seven lives.



Village half-buried by volcanic ashes, Bali, Indonesia

I am also sitting here thinking how to be kind to children, whom we often bully by teaching them the proper things to do and getting angry with them when they can’t follow. Instead of sharing the sourness and sweetness of an orange, we teach them that it is round and o-r-a-n-g-e. Instead of realizing our own similar stubbornness, we get frustrated with them for being slow, uncooperative and refusing to learn.

Rocket Robot, Dongwook’s (10 years-old) creation for the coming exhibition

I am sitting here thinking about the sea, sand, mountain, rain and fields I floated through in Bali that day. I am thinking perhaps I should not bother living to a ripe, old age if my mind will cease to change from this moment. But I do apologise that my mind is like a boat drifting on a river.

Toyabungkah, Bali, Indonesia


You see when I was a child, I liked to destroy things. I tore papers, cut hair off my dolls, broke cups and wasted crayons on meaningless squiggles. When someone said “good”, I always said “bad”; when someone said “stop”, I never stopped. It was funny to see everything turned up-side down.

As I grew up, I learnt to make things. I put papers in clear plastic files, cleaned and dried my cups, ironed my clothes, combed my hair, and drew lines with a metal ruler. Because I was good at making things nice and perfect, many people liked me.

Then one day, as I was walking home, I saw an Oni. It was with a curious creature which had patches of colours on its body and resembled a cat. Although I did not know why, Oni and its cat followed me home that day. They came into the house and destroyed everything. The cat tore my wall paper, scratched my leather sofa and unrolled all the paper tissue rolls. While it was at that, Oni cut my bed into half.

I screamed “What are you doing? Nobody cuts a bed!”
It answered “Why not?”
Then it cut the legs of all my tables and chairs.
I screamed “Nobody does that!”
It answered “Why not?”
I cried “You’re destroying everything!”
It answered “No, I just want to make something beautiful.”

And so it did. I did not understand oni and the cat, but till this day I live with them. On certain days we annoyed one another, but we also laughed a lot.


cat and plant, onistudio


*** *** *** ***

SOME CAME WITH THEIR SOUL IN A BOTTLE
AND LEFT WITH THEIR HEARTS UNDER THEIR SOLES
Zai Kuning's solo exhibition

work in progress, onistudio

I could remember correctly, I thought the beginning of the process leading to the work started like this. One rainy night, around 2am, I was woken up by a constant knocking outside. My house is usually surrounded by noises of insects and birds, so I wondered if that was an unusually loud woodpecker. I opened the door, and to my surprise, I found Zai cutting a tree with a kitchen knife.

“What are you doing?” I asked, visibly irritated.
“I’m cutting this tree, it is sick!” he answered.
I said “But you’re killing the tree!”
Zai replied “No, I’m saving it!”
I asked “Ok, but can’t you do it tomorrow?” and he replied,
“No. Give me a minute and I will chase this devil away.”


Pencil drawing, Zai Kuning

And so he did. With his left hand holding onto an umbrella (which he eventually discarded), and right hand hacking the tree, the supposed sick tree was fell. The rain continued to fall and I collapsed back to sleep. I realized on the next day, that the tree was reduced to a termite hill. The termites were residing in that very sick tree. It was very puzzling experience.


Paisan and Zai, onistudio

Like I said, I thought that was the beginning of the work process. Thereafter , it was the visiting of Paisan from Thailand, who was here for his exhibition at Your Mother Gallery. He stayed in onistudio for three days and slept with the cat. He and Zai had fun playing with each other and it is also the first time I see Zai jamming with a brush instead of a guitar (or a kitchen knife).

With less than a week to the openeing, it is 1am now but there are still many busy souls in here working really hard.

Isa hard at work


Zai hard at work

to end off this note, onistudio warmly invites you to the opening reception of Zai’s solo exhibition

Some Came with Their Soul in a Bottle and
Left with Their Hearts Under Their Soles.


16 April. Thu. 7pm
Jendela (Visual Arts Space)
Level 2, Esplanade Mall


Haven't we not met for a long time? We hope to see you there.

Friday, October 24, 2008

A Bowl of Rice - Last Cycle



As a final entry to conclude A Bowl of Rice, below is an excerpt of an extensive dialogue between art historian T.K Sabapathy (in italics) and Zai on the work.

Rice comes from intense labour and with various kinds of farming technology that have been devised, the production of rice is continuous and no more seasonal. Watching you deal with this material, I am wondering if consciously or unconsciously, you are emulating the intensity of labour in rice planting? The intensity of labour is also reflected in the nature of the drawing you have developed. The drawing is detailed, elaborate and almost fussy; it is also uncharacteristic of your art language.

I think in order to be able to talk about certain things, I need to put some effort in physical work, and also give time. So when I talk about them, I really know where they come from. For the case of this work, I only realized how much labour I need to put in while executing it - standing, sitting and squatting with all the blood rushes. I’m not a farmer, I’m a city-boy; My physical activities and conditions are just like any other city person. We don’t squat six or seven hours and our legs are not so strong. This project really provokes my physical condition.


I have also been asked why I want to explore design in this work. Most of my conceptual works are not interested with design. Take the exhibition A Tree in a Room in 2004, I simply brought a tree into Sculpture Square Chapel Gallery. Similarly, I can get 1000kg of rice and just pour it onto the gallery floor for people to look at. That’s contemporary work. But if that is so, then I don’t challenge myself enough. I try not to repeat that form of working because it’s too comfortable and there’s less tension. So I decided to explore something which I have been arrogant about, which is design.

A Tree in a Room, 2004

I am still thinking about what design means? What can designs do to our mind when we look at them at a massive scale? Must they have a wow-factor? Are designs simply just decorations? I’m not sure, I have to take my time to think about this. When you go into the some temples the designs seem too much, but when you go into a Turkish mosque, the designs are so intricate.

In fact I am re-visiting a habit of mine as a child, to draw very intricately. When I went to art school, I learnt about conceptual works which can be very minimal or even in opposition to certain techniques. You know it is like if I do this, I’m against that. But here I am doing intricate designs. Besides the labour involved, I’m also challenging my own arrogance or prejudice against craft or design. I need to understand craft and design because they are everywhere - in the house, on the t-shirt, in the books… It’s everywhere.

A Bowl of Rice, third cycle

You were a little surprised when I used the word symmetry when we spoke earlier. How can something be seen as symmetrical? Usually symmetry is something which you have pre-worked-out already. For A Bowl of Rice, you may have subconsciously worked something out but I doubt you have worked out the details of the whole drawing.

I didn’t.

And yet there were certain demands that you put on yourself as you developed it. Even as you finished one sector, you stood up and looked at the other sector, and decided how that sector was going to connect and relate to this sector. That’s how the order and relationship begin to emerge. This kind of ordered power is to me, so important here in this work. On the other hand, order in your past works were very much improvised. There was certain degree of randomness and the accidental, so although it made sense, the order was not overwhelming or commanding as it is here. And for me, Zai, this has a certain hypnotic quality because of the sheer extensiveness.

The space itself is big.

Yes you could feel as if you are drawn to it or drawn into it, even if we cannot go into it. And you also have a centre made up of nine gold coins, which is the beginning of all building techniques in Southeast Asia; That is the cosmic centre upon which everything is built up.


I think it is related to architecture, especially the older technique where they could spend a lot of time building. I think I should not be afraid to think about centre because most traditions, whether philosophical or religious, are based on the idea of having a center.

Absolutely.

What does a center mean? The center leads us to something quite constructive, unless you purposely want to make a center and have funny movements around it. That is just to express yourself. What I mean by center, is the higher form of expression. There is also difference in understanding the European sense of self-expression and expression. What is expression? How did the ancient people understand what expression is? I have to question that. Saba, I have told you for many years that I do not have anything to express because I don’t understand myself. If you want to express yourself, the question is how do you understand your self? If we get into the answer, actually we don’t have a self. So what is there to express and what is there to say?


I think the ancient method by using geometry, lines, circles and squares is to express something beyond the self. This brings people into something connected to something beyond the ego and leads them to something larger than the self; The self is not very important.

How interesting.

That’s what I was thinking: what does geometry mean? Some people did come into the gallery and said that the drawing is not geometrical, and it isn’t, in a mathematical sense. Actually I want to talk about how geometry influenced the minds of the people in the past, architecture, literature and all that. I think geometric designs really function quite powerfully and people find, a sort of, I can’t find the right word, peace? But it is not religious.

That’s the point. I know we are finding the word to describe this. Higher and larger, but not in any orthodox or symbolic ways at all. It is not pointing to a particular belief system.


You talk about humility; I’m quite taken up by that remark. Could you say something about that? How does this particular project, the medium of drawing and the discipline of drawing engender humility?

I have had some experiences with farmers in Bali and Malaysia, but I have worked more with fishermen. There are basically two communities of people who feed us: farmer and fisherman. They grow and hunt for food; We have money, and we buy from them. When I was studying under Sultan Takbir Alis Jahbana in 1989, we talked about rituals which are created by farmers and fishermen. They are the people who in many, many ways, need rituals because they depend on nature and they pray for rain, wind and so on. From this arises the practice of using materials from rice, tapioca leaves to cloth to make designs. They have been doing this for thousands of years and there is nothing new to create.

One of the areas which I am always very interested with ritual is that its process is directed towards humility. It is an act of surrendering and offering that brings one’s ego down . Humility is like a wind, not a stone which can stay permanently; You are not created as a humble person, yet mind is capable of being humble although it is always disturbed and destructive. We always search for humility so that we are not easily affected by anything. I use the word humility, not peace. I think that’s what ritual really does to people, because the act of surrendering and offering actually brings certain grounded feeling inside us.

When it comes to visual art installations, I think physicality is very important. From music to theatre to installation work, it is always very important for me to think about ritual. Ritual reminds people that we must be connected to something that is larger than our being; it is not so much about art. At least the ritualistic aspect of the work should make you remember for example, a paddy field, which some people may not have seen except on screen. I want to suggest people putting in some effort to find a paddy field; Look at the buffalo, see how big it is, and how it breathes. When you see the actual environment and production, then you can reconsider what you are eating and why you are eating.

The material, rice. There are so many issues about rice for the past few months so I thought I should just work with this as a material and find ways to understand many problems. I didn’t have a solution in mind when I decided to choose rice, it was just a gut feeling to get 500 or 1000kg of rice. Through the process of drawing, I learn something. It is a little bit different from some artists who make a proposal, full-stop, and do the work. They stop learning after the proposal is done. I think process work means you set off with a certain idea and you keep learning. In a way, I see that as humility: developing work and not just creating a concrete thing.


I was linking that with another aspect of what you are doing with A Bowl of Rice and that is the method, the scale, the material you are using, the way you have to arrange your body, and the kind of time that is required. I’m building up to this state of absorption which you have to be immersed in. And that total absorption and immersion can also be a way of arriving at humility. It is not that you are the master, but you are part of and inside the work. You can only see the little patch that you are bent over and the little bowl of rice you have in your hand. That’s it. It’s only when you get out that you can see the whole thing; But that whole thing happens only because of that single bowl of rice in your hand; From that alone, the rest has emerged. To me, this is also a sense of humility and you have to, while developing the work, think about whether the whole picture will work or not work. How is it going to expand? These are things that make you small, rather than make you big. Am I making sense of this in a way? This is my end of looking at it.


You described it in a wonderful way. Yes, the process doesn’t make me feel big but it makes me feel small in many, many ways.



Other entries on A Bowl of Rice:

Invitation Opening Work in Progress H.O.M.E Second Cycle


Saturday, September 20, 2008

Book from Hell

Post By Shiyun
The night Book from Hell ended, Zai and I saw the fuzzy moon through the dark foliage of the flame-of-the-forest.


It was a beautiful closure to the show.

Thanks to all the supporting friends and family members, the production came together with too much food, merry-making and laughter. Coming from several years in theatre-making and looking at the art scene as a voyeur, I must say that it is not easy to avoid fights, especially of selfishness and malicious gossiping. However in the case of this production, although there were disagreements in the process of making, there was always regard for one another and everyone almost always talked calmly. Regard for one another, I believe, is one of the most important spirit in any kind of relationship.

dickson, sharon, zai, kondoh, woan wen, otomo, shaiful

Here goes a list of thanks.

Firstly, I thank the front-of-house ladies (Sharon, Ji Seon and friend) whose presence had made my backstage crew and production coordinator stood at the front door until 1 minute before the show started. Thanks to Charmaine too, who graciously switched duties at the very last minute and took video for us. And I shouldn’t forget our favorite person, Donna Ong, who could not be with us but had taken trouble to look for helpers.

I think the next time we have a show, we will have many people coming just to see the front-of-house girls (and not the show). This is great, but I’m sorry I forgot to take photographs of them… ….

Shaiful and Jae

Then the production team. Thanks to Shaiful, for his very, very not-shy demeanor that has brought so much jest on and off the set. Too bad we didn’t get to see your underwear this time L Woan Wen, who seemed to take a lot of pleasure out of the only show where she can light very dimly without anyone nagging behind her back. Cho, our super-hero who spent his birthday (and we only knew because he mentioned that LKY birthday was a day before) driving me and Shai from Esplanade - Ayer Rajah - Bugis - Changi. And also KK, in Tien’s words ‘a very talented guy’, who came and did some rock-and-roll shots of the rehearsals.

cho

(I didn’t manage to take a clear picture of Woan Wen because of her paranoia of camera. She even swayed back and forth for a minute when I pointed the camera at her and I gave up)

The production wouldn’t have come together so well without sound engineer Kondoh san, in Otomo’s words ‘the best in the world’. His warped sense of humour (sending a photograph of him sleeping to introduce himself), precision in work (I’ve hardly seen a man who runs around in the theatre and keeps referring to his watch while working), fascination with lizards (to the point of climbing chairs to take photograph of them) and energy (turning dark-brown after traveling around Singapore hours before the show) simply amazed and amused us.

Kondoh at work

I also have to mention a special thanks to Kim Seng, our boss who made Book from Hell possible. All the Esplanade staff, who usually work 1 month in advance and so sorry that we are always late to give information. We can’t help it! It’s in our blood to improvise!


dickson, kondoh, otomo, kim seng at play


There were also friends and family who contributed to the instrument and set on stage. John Sharpley, who unreservedly lent us his 200-year-old Bidayu gong. Kai, who kept Zai’s very loud and noisy gong even after his cat has used it as a toilet bowl for many year. My father, who stayed up and made the metal frames at a very short notice without any fuss.



The artists. Otomo, whose name literally means ‘big friend’, has left such a deep impression being an incredibly humble yet critical person. Yes otomo-san I still remember that we have to bring you around Southeast Asia to swallow all the animals which can either fly, walk, swim or run. Erm, no artist fees!

Dickson, who has visited Singapore many times, is as accommodating as ever and has never kicked up a fuss about anything. I still can’t figure out the gadget you have that looks like you’ve trapped the spirits of tortured animals and robots in a clear box. Like Zai said, it’s attractive to girls. Very cute!

Zai. I’ll leave it to the interest of others to talk about Zai on their blogs. I can only say that you are always the life of the party and source of inspiration for everyone.

To the artists, I thank you for your professionalism and patience.


So what’s coming next? Bowl of Rice has ended in Sculpture Square. Book from Hell has ended in Esplanade. As a producer, I’m incredibly proud, and feel even more pressured to discover opportunities for these works to develop. The rest of the year should mark diligence in documenting, archiving past works, and planning the continuation of A Bowl of Rice and Book from Hell.

I will end this note with a rehearsal video clip of the very fine performance by Zai Kuning, Otomo Yoshihide and Dickson Dee.